So What is the Difference...?

So what is the difference between an economic reward system and a bribe. This is not as black and white as it might seem. I have heard some people say that an allowance is a bribe. In wikipedia it mentions that in some cultures it is considered a bribe to leave a tip at a restaurant. Everyone who earns a salary, bonus, or commission experiences money as a reward system. So when does it become a bribe?

In the U.S. we traditionally think of bribes as an offering of money that supports an unethical act. For instance, if someone offered a police officer money to ignore a crime being committed. Another example might be if a corporate executive was offered money to ignore product findings that could harm the public. I think we could all agree that these are clear examples of bribes. What about a boss offering a quarterly bonus plan to his/her employees? Is that a bribe? Is it a bribe to offer your children an allowance for doing chores?

I recently heard that if money is being offered for general expected behavior then it is a bribe. I want ask the question then, is it a bribe to get paid by your company for general expected behavior? I receive a salary and commissions for general expected behavior in my position. Is that a bribe? As humans we experience intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. It would be wonderful if the world only functioned based on intrinsic qualities, such as for the joy of working. However, the truth is that this is not how our society functions. Even our pastors receive compensation. I wonder how many pastors would be leading churches if they had to do it for free. 

Our society is built on economic structures, as are all societies. Whether bartering products or exchanging currency, it is economic systems that allow us to fairly exchange talents and resources. So let me ask you, if your child receives an allowance for contributing their talents and resources, is it a bribe? Or is a bribe more directly tied to the ethical motive behind the exchange of currency and products. I will agree that there are intrinsic values, such as manners that need to be taught beyond the confines of an allowance or reward system. Treating people with love and grace is beyond extrinsic reward. It is commanded by God, therefore should be followed. In fact our own society will fine people economically for not following particular social expectations. 

On the other hand, we must teach our children that reward for their effort has value. After all this is how they will make a living in life. They should receive their reward with grace and humility. They need to learn to give as gracefully as they receive. I believe that as parents if we do not teach our children these principles we are the ones at fault. Prepare your children for the real world. Reward systems are part of the real world, therefore we need to teach them to earn and handle those rewards with grateful hearts.

Grant Magers

CEO

Moola Monsters, LLC

www.moolamonsters.com

School's Out for the Summer

Who doesn't remember how good it felt when the bell sounded on the last day of school. It meant summer vacations, time in the pool, summer camp, and of course baseball. I still have those flashback memories when I smell the summer air in Richardson, Texas. I remember going to my Dad's softball games. I was the bat boy and he was the big hitter on the team. Every-time he was up to bat I would tell him to hit a home run, and usually he did.

I also remember my mom saying things by the end of the summer months, like "I can't wait for the kids to go back to school." I can remember complaining about how bored I was by August. Somehow the the thrill of summer had worn off. My sister and I became mindless drones sitting in front of the t.v. It was too hot to go outside and play much of the day. We were bored with our toys. The t.v. was the only summer constant.

So here we are on the other side of the fence now. We are the parents with children excited for summer. I agree that the kids should get a break and have some fun. Life should be fun. However, if you find yourself asking "when will school start again" let me make a suggestion. After July 4th, plan one hour 4 days a week for your kids to do something educational. If you can do more even better, but do not let them become permanently glued to the sofa watching the t.v. or playing video games. They need to do some math, reading, writing, or other activities. Keep their developing brains growing.

It is you versus summer boredom for your kids. Help them grow, they need you.

Grant Magers

CEO

Moola Monsters

www.moolamonsters.com

The Root of All Evil?

We have all heard the expression "money is the root of all evil". Is it really? Money allows me to buy food. It allows me to put a roof over my wife and kids' heads. It allows my to obtain medication when we are sick. No... I really don't think that money is the problem. 

I bring this up because I have heard parents  say that they have concerns about teaching their children too much about money. In other words, they do not want it to be too much of a focus in their lives. I understand the fear of making money too much of a central theme in a child's life. I am certainly empathetic to that position. Consider this, parents will spend enormous amounts of resources teaching their kids sports. However, less than 1% of those kids will ever do anything more than recreational activity with sports. Even those who do go on to professional careers in sports will be faced with dealing with vast amounts of money.

Let's be honest here, there is no getting away from money. We can either teach our children how to manage it responsibly, or hope they pick it up along the way as adults. Personally, I am not crazy about just hoping that my kids learn about money, no more than I am just hopeful they will learn about good nutrition. Think about it like this, we do not want our children over obsessing about food, but does that mean we never teach them about good nutrition?

I believe one of the reasons we have fears about the topic of money is because so many of us do not fully understand it ourselves. How many of us understand completely the kreb cycle and it's function in our cardiovascular health? Probably not that many of us, but I bet we still teach our children about the importance of exercise. Remember, money will be a part of your children's life ... no different than nutrition or exercise. Teach them principles about saving, giving, and working hard and smart. Your children need you to prepare them for life. So, what are you waiting for... prepare them.

Grant Magers

CEO

Moola monsters, LLC

www.moolamonsters.com

The Role of Structure

Working with Dr. Michael Schuster has taught me a great deal about the importance of structure in business. I have seen failing companies turn around in a matter of months by focusing on the structure of each aspect of their business. A lot of the ideas Dr. Schuster teaches related to structure comes from Peter Senge, Director of the Center for Organizational Learning at MIT and author of "The Fifth Discipline". One of the primary thoughts surrounding Senge's work, that Dr. Schuster teaches regularly, is that Philosophy/Values drives our approach ,which drives our structure, which in turn creates patterns of behavior that ultimately produce our results. Let's take this approach and apply it to raising our children. 

Weekly, I hear from parents that their children are not behaving in a manner they would like them to behave. For instance, they do not take care of their toys, they bite, they will not eat their dinner or go to bed on time. This can be very stressful for parents. Most parents I speak with are asking themselves, "Am I doing something wrong" or "Am I a bad parent"? The answer is, no, you're not a bad parent. There is a structural problem.

Let's apply Senge's work to raising our children. To begin we must start with what are our values as parents and our philosophy about raising children. These values will determine the approach you will take in the structure of children's growth and education. Once you have identified and understood the values and approach ask yourself, "Are the results we see in line with the values we hold and the approach we have taken? Are you seeing behavioral results such as crying, biting, poor manners, etc? What results are you seeing with your children. What do these results tell you? These are the hard questions to consider. To answer these questions we really need to be honest with ourselves.

Patterns of behavior produce results. So if we do not like the results we are getting we need to consider there are some patterns of behavior that are not in line with our values. What patterns of behavior can you identify in your own life as parents, that are contributing to the behavior results of your children? Changing patterns of behavior is not necessarily an easy task. However, we have to be honest with ourselves and look at them if we are going to see change.

Once you have identified the patterns of behavior we can begin to look at structure. There are structural systems in each home that contribute to the patterns of behavior. What is your structure for your children regarding their chores and responsibilities? What are your structures regarding TV time or game consoles? Create rules, boundaries, expectations, and consequences. See them through and be consistent. Reward them when they are behaving well. Express to them your gratitude and approval for a job well done. 

There are many developmental and behavioral systems to help parents create structure for their children. The key is to stay consistent. Remember progress not perfection.

Grant Magers

CEO

Moola Monsters, LLC

www.moolamonsters.com

Acknowledgments: 

Dr. Michael Schuster

CEO/Founder

Schuter Center for Professional Development

Peter Senge

Director of the Center for Organizational Learning

MIT, Sloan School of Management,

Founding Partner  of Innovation Associates in Boston and

Author of "The Fifth Discipline"

This week while traveling to Boston I over heard a three ladies visiting about raising children. One mother described a scenario where her daughter was not taking care of her toys. She mentioned that she really wanted to see a change in her daughter's heart regarding such things. Later in the conversation, she continued to go on and describe a time where her daughter forgot her lunch at home. She considered teaching her daughter a lesson and letting her go the day without lunch, but decided that Christ extends grace and mercy to us so she should do the same for her daughter. She then brought her daughter's lunch up to the school.

Something in this dialogue really concerned me. On one hand this mother wants to see a change in her daughter's heart regarding responsibility (i.e., the responsibility of taking care of her things). On the other hand, the mom neglected an opportunity for her daughter to experience a consequence for not caring for her things and being responsible (in this case her lunch). What is even more concerning is that Christ's grace became the reason for not allowing her child to experience a consequence for her actions.

Please consider this question. What did her daughter learn? Did her daughter learn that we should show grace and mercy to others, or did her daughter learn that she does not have to be responsible, mom will take care of everything? I would argue the latter. Please understand, I believe that we must teach our children grace and mercy. Grace and mercy are paramount in Christian living. However, are we showing our children grace and mercy if we do not teach them there are consequences for their actions?

I recognize that these types of decisions are not always clear cut. It is up to us as parents to do the best job we can in determining when we teach hard lessons. While I empathize that this can be challenging, it is important to teach our children life lessons so that they do not have to experience those life lessons as adults. As adults we experience, financial hardships, failed marriages, addiction, and other damaging consequences for decisions we make. I want my children to experience simple consequences for actions now so they will hopefully never have to experience a more devastating consequence later in life. Remember, God's grace and mercy does not promise freedom from pain in today's world. Sometimes we must experience these things in order to grow. We must experience these things in order to have "a change in our hearts".

We are a product of our...? That is the age old question. Are we merely predetermined in our genetic code or are we a product of our environment? The debate will continue on for years to come I'm sure. One interesting phenomenon that I have noticed is that Corporate America must believe we are a product of their "marketing efforts." Have you ever stopped to see how many commercials our children are bombarded with in one hour of cartoons. It is amazing!!! Fast paced, lots of colors and activity, blasting their developing minds at record pace. 

Is it any wonder that the MTV generation today are massive consumers. We were trained as young children to consume. Clothes, food, games, toys, energy, etc, etc.... We consume and consume, even when we know intellectually that we need to stop and save. The only real way to break the cycle is to begin re-educating our children. 

We have to teach our children they have a greater life than to just be consumers. We must teach them that they are inventors, builders, educators, and more. We must teach them that there are consequences for actions and that good things come to those who wait. They are not doomed to the impulse buy unless we as parents we do nothing to teach them otherwise. Teach your children for the betterment of their futures and the betterment of our country.

Sincerely,

Grant Magers

CEO

Moola Monsters, LLC

www.moolamonsters.com

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